Tidy Mucilage Kingpin

could have called this post  Zombies, Vampires and Facebook Friends.    But I had this nifty title and image saved in my queue and somehow this painting of writhing fish seemed fitting to yet another post about friendship,  even if today I have vowed to stop wallowing in self-pity and to focus on promoting my friend Holly’s current contest entry.

I think most of us are well familiar with emotional vampires.   Folks who constantly need so much (praise, validation, sympathy, what have you) that they seem to just suck the life out of everyone around them.   I think that everyone has needy moments sometimes,  and believe it one of the highest duties of friendship to reassure our friends when they are having such a moment.   But having them all the time.   That is SO not tidy.     Honestly,  no one should be the kingpin of emotional vampires.

I have to confess that as with vampires,   I have at times been a zombie too.    In the sense that Holly has been talking about it a zombie is someone who approaches blogging or social networking mostly as a matter of ramping up numbers.    There was a time when I somehow had come to believe that unique visitors and Google Page Rank were THE marks of success as a web publisher and devoted an inordinate amount of time to chasing unique visitors,  most of whom never read any of the posts on the blog (not that they had any interest in those posts) and checked my PR almost constantly.   It took me a long time to realize that visiting three hundred or more blogs each day in order to get return visits  from other bloggers (who were also chasing unique visitors and PR as some kind of Mecca) contributed nothing whatsoever to creating an engaging and compelling web site where I had conversations with visitors who might become friends.

I don’t think that blogging is dying,  nor in danger of being taken over by vampires and zombies.   I do think that each blogger must learn for themselves what the various stats are,  what they mean and decide how much attention they want to pay to their stats.      Honestly?    I’m not paying much attention to mine for this blog.)    I much prefer to focus on conversations with my friends.   Speaking of,  my friend Holly is in  (yes, yet Another) blog contest and I would really appreciate it,   if you have any comments or thoughts at all on this topic,  that you visit Holly’s post Blogging With A Silver Bullet and leave your comments there.


10 comments on “Tidy Mucilage Kingpin

  1. Oh, right, post this while I’m out with my honey celebrating our 28th anniversary! Hah! Sneaked on in on me again, didn’t you? Thank you, Alan – what would I do without you? (I knew I’d missed this when I started seeing comments from people I KNEW followed YOUR breadcrumbs to find me!) I’ve never seen you act like one of the Emotional Hoovers or a zombie, Alan. (Not that I ever want to – just sayin’ – if you’ve been one in the past year or so, you’ve hidden it from me well.)

    • I will never understand why some posts get lots of traffic and attention and other do not. But this is one of the clearest lessons I have learned doing the blog every day thing this year. Why this post was mostly ignored, I simply can not say. But it does look like your contest post has gotten lots of attention. When does this contest end?

      • Well, you KNOW where I was! I’m not sure… closes to new entries on 7/15, voting/sharing/shameless promotion runs to 7/31 – results are usually announced fairly early on the date promised. Can’t wait to the last minute – you know that Abhi, and Jafar. And lord knows what Justin’s giving away in exchange for votes this time… 😉 I should check. I’m determined to win an iPad or Kindle from him some time this year!

      • The giveaway is quite tempting! I fell for the iPad giveaway myself! And sadly I didn’t win!

        As for some posts working more than the others; I really don’t get. Maybe we haven’t networked enough?

      • Whew! 😉 Well, last time, it was an iPad3 – Justin does have some pretty sweet giveaways over there each month. Check it out again in July, and tell him I sent you – in spite of myself.

  2. Well you have to trust Holly to come up with the “weird – cool” ideas around!

    She has written it beautifully and the sarcasm and humor makes so much sense!

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