“….sometimes a fantasy, is all you need.”
I often say that I live so much of my life inside of my head. I think I have a healthy respect and appreciation for fantasy. Though some times you definitely need real life things too. I went and got my insulin today. I was thrilled that with my new insurance the co-pay was only three dollars and thirty cents. Given that Walmart charges $120 (the cheapest regular retail price I know of) this alone makes the insurance a great value. I will have to make an appointment and go back and see my doctor. I am going to insist he refer me to a shrink to manage my psych meds. I am a happy camper to be getting most of my meds at this point and look forward to having them all in the not too distant future.
I’m honestly not sure where I am at the moment on the manic-depressive scale. I seem to have backed off the major mania and have been sleeping more or less regularly for several days now. And I am definitely finding it difficult and a struggle to write much of anything at all. I am doing some socializing and some game playing (I continue to really enjoy The Sims on Facebook. I was sad to find that my current lappy just isn’t up to playing the current version of The Sims 2 (the CD Rom game.) But I haven’t been able to bring myself to touch the manuscript for the Missions Guide I have been planning to release on July 1st, on the one year anniversary of the initial publication of Walking Down The Avenue. And after putting up a web site and writing some introductory bally hoo, I haven’t really worked on the pseudonymous project at all either. (Sighs.)
I know that if I am going to have the new book ready for release July 1st I need to start writing it in earnest like yesterday. Yet as I gain more experience with Empire Avenue missions each day, I find my perspective shifting so rapidly that I’m honestly not sure what I am going to write. I try to comfort myself with the thought that when I am quite certain what I want my guide to using Empire Avenue missions to say I will be able to knock it out in no time at all, and aren’t I wise not to try to force a book that just isn’t there yet. I find this small comfort compared to my serious writer friends (who aren’t collecting disability) who set themselves a budget of so many words or so many pages and force themselves to work at it each day until the day’s budget has been produced. Writing on a drop dead line really is so much harder than writing when the inspiration strikes.