Two Bits A Shot

“Life is a crap game, two bits a shot.   When you’re cold, you’re cold and when you’re hot, you’re hot.”

I am definitely feeling on the down side this afternoon.    I’ve been re-reading Rita Mae Brown’s novel  Loose Lips  (the quote above is from page 144) and while I have never been much interested in craps or dice,   this little folk saying speaks volume to me at the moment.     I slept for about 16 hours,  then woke up with no spark, no energy.   Feeling just totally blah.    Ron is watching some show on some channel and I looked up and saw some restaurant cook stacking  up chicken patties,  sliced beef and other things into a huge tall sandwich.   And my stomach turned and I thought to myself,  ‘yech’.

Everything is driving me batty today it seems.    I was on Facebook and trying to type a reply to some comment thread or another.    So a little chat box pops up at the bottom of the screen.   This is mildly annoying but I just ignored it and continued to type.    Then the screen scrolls,   I am at the top of the page and no obvious means of returning to the sentence I was literally in the middle of composing.   I tell you,  it took  great restraint to refrain from hurling my laptop at the wall.   I did close the Facebook tab and have resolved not to use that site again today.    Honestly,   if I keep running into frustrations it may prove necessary to crawl into bed with a book and pull the covers up over my eyes.

If I am not mistaken,   when I press Publish in a few minutes,   writing this little blog post will keep me on my post every calendar day schedule.   And in my heart,  I know that at least is something to be proud of.   But my inner editor looks at these three paragraphs of not terribly clever thoughts,  that are really just a glimpse of the pain I feel today and thinks that none of this is really worth reading.


2 comments on “Two Bits A Shot

  1. Holly, I do seem to have found a way to force myself to crank out at least some kind of post every day. I don’t promote every post though, and honestly have been somewhat lax about replying to comments. I don’t kid myself that some of these riffs on thoughts and feelings are as substantive as a real blog post. Yet I find that even with out promotion some of my friends do come in and read whatever I wrote. So it is some kind of real communication and I will go on being a little proud of myself for writing every day. Even as I struggle to write better posts and promote and the really do the blog thing rather than just go through the motions every day.

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