On Being An Outlaw

When I think about it,   I realize I’ve always been a sort of outlaw.    I remember as a teenager in the early 1980’s learning about sodomy laws  (boy that’s a term you don’t hear much anymore) and being outraged and horrified to discover that sex between consenting adults could be illegal.   While I was certainly glad when the Supreme Court in 2003 struck down all of the remaining sodomy laws,  including in my native Louisiana,   I have to say that I never let the fact that it was illegal stop me from having sex in any way I preferred.

I’ve mentioned before that Ron and I don’t want to get married,   even if when gay marriage becomes legal here in Washingon state,  either in June or after the November election if those who are opposed to my civil rights succeed in forcing a ballot question.  I have not previously answered,   when asked why we don’t want to get married.    While I fully support marriage equality and would fight for the rights of any two consenting adults to enjoy the full benefits of marriage,  the fact is that for over forty years now I’ve gotten accustomed to being a sexual outlaw.    I’m glad I’m not illegal anymore but I have no desire whatsoever to participate in a social form which I do not believe would confer any real benefit upon me or my huzband,   given our particular circumstances.   (Ron and I are both on social security disability.    Were we a heterosexual couple,  we would be foolish to marry since doing so would significantly lower the amount we receive each month.)   And I know in my heart that no piece of paper could make our relationship any stronger than it is.   I also don’t believe we could possibly love or cherish each other any more than we do,   regardless of whatever some politicians may think of us or our relationship.

I am grateful to live in an era when young queer folk  (gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, trans-gender-ed) continuously hear the message  “it gets better”.    But frankly,   having been an outlaw all my life.   I have zero interest in joining the ranks of the respectably wed.


2 comments on “On Being An Outlaw

  1. Good post Alan 🙂 I suppose I’m part of that younger generation, and I def look forward to walking down the aisle…Unfortunately we live in reddest of the red Texas, so yea, no legal meaning hehe

  2. Trevor, I wish you a long and happy marriage with whomever you may chose to settle down with. I know a few guys in Houston, and have some straight friends there but overall I don’t really talk much to friends from Texas, which is part of why I really really value the perspectives of those few Texans who have made it into the “inner circle” of my regard. Thing is, when I get manic I love to talk. An honestly, I really talk by typing. I love that this personal blog has allowed me to ‘just be me’ to a much larger extent than any other writing project I have ever worked on.


    There are a lot of things that are actually very central to my life that I never talk about on this blog, an very rarely publicly talk about on any sites that are in any way connected to my “wallet name”, Alan L Jobe or any of the aliases I have been working to associate with Libdrone Books, which is the first 5 pages of results if you google libdrone. No matter what I had done to promote myself over the years I have been blogging, I feel quite certain that I would Never overcome the orthopedic surgeon in Ohio who has the exact same name, whom I don’t know and probably will never meet. And who has written prolifically for medical journals about orthopedic surgery for many years and who accounts for fully the first twenty pages of results for anyone who googles my wallet name.

    I am actually spending most of my time these days working on a new project. It is very pre beta but it is a fictional, yet very honest look at gay sexuality, with visuals of moi. I am determined this comment, is going to be one of the only times my wallet name mentions in passing that he has a secret nom du’ porn. But if you want…..I could pass you the link 🙂

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