There, but not there. That’s kind of how I feel today. Sometimes on the Internet, things move so fast that it is easy to forget how large this planet is, how far away many of the people you speak with really are and how much of life simply can not be accessed on a screen nor controlled with a mouse.
I have mentioned before that I suffer from bipolar disorder. I have been taking medicine for it, though I am about to run out of seroquel and not planning to splurge on a doctor’s appointment until February so not sure if I will have more after tomorrow, at least for a time. When I have a manic episode I may remain awake for 48 hours or more, feeling highly motivated and energetic. I may accomplish a great deal during a manic cycle. Why just last week (wasn’t it?) I negotiated a publishing contract with an author, made a big announcement about it, bought a domain and put up a web site for my new author, and did I suspect six other impossible things as well before breakfast.
So my manic cycle passed, I slept twelve hours. Then had kind of a day from hell. My newly signed author and I had a bit of a mis-communication of the sort that might take several days to sort out. I had a long and pointless argument with a good friend I talk to every day and see usually every week or so. I set out to defend the idea that “logic is not necessarily always the winner over emotion”. (I am more emotional than logical and was arguing This topic with a guy who thinks more or less like Mr. Spock.) I even managed to have a fight with my spouse. #SOnotMyDay
I have decided to press forward with publishing Black And White. In my considered opinion it is a brilliant bit of literature. And I will print out and archive the messages from the author stating that I have permission to publish it. I’ve written her a snail mail telling her she is more than welcome to quit Facebook and Twitter and not be an ‘online personality’. But I have begged her to keep writing. I stopped arguing with my friend and we are just talking again. And my spouse is listening to music and smiling and nodding with his headphones on. So maybe I could call this post A Better Day 🙂
(Or if I were a children’s book writer I would call it Alan and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.)